December 5, 2012
Custom 3d Reel and Viewer While this blog tends to focus more on the worst rather than the best, I think this absolutely falls in the latter category.  It’s a freaking View-Master!  Not only that, but you can upload digital photos and create your own reel for $24.95!  A little background on this…  As a child, my parents would often take us on road trips to national parks and monuments.  The highlight of the trips was the View-Master reels that my parents would occasionally buy me from the gift shop since they were “educational”.  I had an absolute crap load of these…  Mount Rushmore, the Grand Canyon, the National Mall, Hoover Dam, She-Ra (DON’T YOU JUDGE ME!!!), Yellowstone, you name it!Definitely going to order it.  The big question is, what pictures do I want to View-Masterize?  My first trip to Japan?  College graduation?  My wedding?   Aw, who am I kidding, if they’ll allow it, I’ll probably just upload multiple pictures of my balls.

Custom 3d Reel and Viewer

While this blog tends to focus more on the worst rather than the best, I think this absolutely falls in the latter category.  It’s a freaking View-Master!  Not only that, but you can upload digital photos and create your own reel for $24.95!  
A little background on this…  As a child, my parents would often take us on road trips to national parks and monuments.  The highlight of the trips was the View-Master reels that my parents would occasionally buy me from the gift shop since they were “educational”.  I had an absolute crap load of these…  Mount Rushmore, the Grand Canyon, the National Mall, Hoover Dam, She-Ra (DON’T YOU JUDGE ME!!!), Yellowstone, you name it!
Definitely going to order it.  The big question is, what pictures do I want to View-Masterize?  My first trip to Japan?  College graduation?  My wedding?   Aw, who am I kidding, if they’ll allow it, I’ll probably just upload multiple pictures of my balls.

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September 18, 2012
Private iPhone Case It’s a case.  For privately viewing your iPhone.  Let me rephrase that, your “mobile” iPhone.  It’s in no way awkward, or ridiculous looking.  It’s a perfectly reasonable way to view the screen.  Carrying this around wouldn’t look odd in the least.

Private iPhone Case

It’s a case.  For privately viewing your iPhone.  Let me rephrase that, your “mobile” iPhone.  It’s in no way awkward, or ridiculous looking.  It’s a perfectly reasonable way to view the screen.  Carrying this around wouldn’t look odd in the least.

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September 17, 2012
Glyde Gear Backpack Scooter I’m convinced Skymall only successfully sells to old people, since even the most  clueless parent wouldn’t be so out of touch that they would subject their child to the ridicule he or she would receive pushing this thing around.  I was never the bullying type, but good lord, I want reach right through my computer screen and give that kid a wedgie.

Glyde Gear Backpack Scooter

I’m convinced Skymall only successfully sells to old people, since even the most  clueless parent wouldn’t be so out of touch that they would subject their child to the ridicule he or she would receive pushing this thing around.  I was never the bullying type, but good lord, I want reach right through my computer screen and give that kid a wedgie.

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September 14, 2012
NFL Forest Face Hundreds of years from now, when archaeologists are looking through our historical remains, I hope somewhere they find a copse of still standing trees that remain adorned with this baffling item.  I once read that when Howard Carter first peered into King Tut’s tomb he was asked what he saw and replied “Wonderful things!”.  I’d imagine Howard Carter of 2350 won’t be nearly as awestruck.

NFL Forest Face

Hundreds of years from now, when archaeologists are looking through our historical remains, I hope somewhere they find a copse of still standing trees that remain adorned with this baffling item.  I once read that when Howard Carter first peered into King Tut’s tomb he was asked what he saw and replied “Wonderful things!”.  I’d imagine Howard Carter of 2350 won’t be nearly as awestruck.

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September 13, 2012
Dragon Ear Cuff Confession time…  I like fantasy novels.  I enjoyed the Lord of the Rings.  I watch Game of Thrones.  I can even handle ridiculous earrings.  That being said, the amount of sharp pointy edges on this thing make it a guaranteed recall hazard.  

Dragon Ear Cuff

Confession time…  I like fantasy novels.  I enjoyed the Lord of the Rings.  I watch Game of Thrones.  I can even handle ridiculous earrings.  That being said, the amount of sharp pointy edges on this thing make it a guaranteed recall hazard.  

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September 12, 2012
iPad Bean Bag Stand $49.99 for a miniature bag, presumably filled with beans.  It holds up your iPad, as opposed to using your hands, a $15.00 combination cover/stand, a folded up shirt, or hell, any number of cheap things lying around the house.  I’d like to meet the individuals who have bought this product.  Then, I’ll tell them I’m a Nigerian prince, and ask them to write me a check for $5000.00.

iPad Bean Bag Stand

$49.99 for a miniature bag, presumably filled with beans.  It holds up your iPad, as opposed to using your hands, a $15.00 combination cover/stand, a folded up shirt, or hell, any number of cheap things lying around the house.  I’d like to meet the individuals who have bought this product.  Then, I’ll tell them I’m a Nigerian prince, and ask them to write me a check for $5000.00.

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September 11, 2012
Diamond Jubilee Queen and Corgi That’s the most unrealistic corgi statuette I’ve ever seen.  However, the queen statuette… That rictus smile, those cold dead eyes… how startlingly lifelike!  

Diamond Jubilee Queen and Corgi

That’s the most unrealistic corgi statuette I’ve ever seen.  However, the queen statuette… That rictus smile, those cold dead eyes… how startlingly lifelike!  

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September 10, 2012
Knuckle Meat Pounder For the rageaholic chef in all of us.   Ok, you honestly can’t convince me that this is bought as anything but a weapon.  As a kitchen tenderizer it’s horribly inconvenient, not to mention it would probably get your fist extremely messy.  It’s also probably not very good for your joints unless you have built up wrist strength punching people (or “pounding meat”) for a living.

Knuckle Meat Pounder

For the rageaholic chef in all of us.  

Ok, you honestly can’t convince me that this is bought as anything but a weapon.  As a kitchen tenderizer it’s horribly inconvenient, not to mention it would probably get your fist extremely messy.  It’s also probably not very good for your joints unless you have built up wrist strength punching people (or “pounding meat”) for a living.

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September 9, 2012
Clip On Bangs Wow, these don’t look fake at all.  Also, am I alone in thinking this model doesn’t like like a real human being?  Look at those dead soulless eyes!

Clip On Bangs

Wow, these don’t look fake at all.  Also, am I alone in thinking this model doesn’t like like a real human being?  Look at those dead soulless eyes!

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Alien Flying Saucer Statue Once again, I find myself running low on ideas.  Time to visit my “go to” spot, the SkyMall garden statuary section…  *opens section, sees Alien Flying Saucer Statue as first item on the page.  List price, $269.00.  Kisses fingers* “Excelsior!”

Alien Flying Saucer Statue

Once again, I find myself running low on ideas.  Time to visit my “go to” spot, the SkyMall garden statuary section…  *opens section, sees Alien Flying Saucer Statue as first item on the page.  List price, $269.00.  Kisses fingers* “Excelsior!”

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